Friday, August 05, 2011

Dear Teenage Girls at the Movie Theater Last Night,

You are adorable with your trendy clothes, ponytails, and smooth skin. I'm glad that you enjoyed the movie even if you did figure out that she was his daughter early on. I'm sorry that the movie theater girl had to tell you to put your feet down off the seats in front of you.

But why, for all things holy, did you not wash your hands after you went to the bathroom?!!?? You look like smart girls. I'm sure you have mothers at home who love you. And I'm sure those same mothers taught you to wash your hands after you pee. But you didn't. Really?! You stood in front of the mirror to fix your hair and check your lip gloss. Would it have been so hard to turn on the water and rinse your hands? It kind of grossed me out and when I heard you say that your "next plans" were to go eat, I think I gagged a little.

Girls, please, please, make it a habit to wash your hands after using the bathroom. Because I'm pretty sure the boys you no doubt went looking for last night would be grossed out too if they knew you didn't wash your hands.

Concerned and Disgusted Fellow Movie Goer


Alyson said...

I bet they're all microbiologists and they're concerned with building up their immune system via exposure ;)

Ada said...


And how the heck can they be smart enough to figure out the movie but not wash their hands??? Seriously, I'm super good at movies and I had no idea. Noooo idea.
And we need to discuss that in person. I have two issues. Not with Ryan Gosling or his hot body though. No issues there. At. All.

kathy said...

be glad you weren't sharing popcorn with them....AND thanks for the tip about the movie. now i don't have to bother spending $10 and two hours of my life watching it myself...

Jen said...

Alyson, they will certainly get "exposure" in a public restroom.

Ada, I was surprised, too, and I'm rarely surprised at movies.

Kathy, I only share popcorn with you and I know you wash your hands. And you should see it on dvd. It's worth watching.

Katrina said...

You should have some business card sized cards made up that say "Wash your hands, or you'll catch ebola and your hair will fall out and you'll die." You can just smile and hand them out. (They'll probably be so embarrassed, they won't bother to google "ebola".)