Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Wrap It Up

Speaking of Arby's (from yesterday's blog), it turned out to be quite an interesting meal. When I walked in, there was only one other person in the restaurant. She was ordering in front of me and got her order to go. We spoke to each other about ketchup and straws and she made a joke about taking my order instead of her own. Okay, kind of weird, but not bad. But then in walked a woman that I knew would make my solo meal at least a little entertaining. I could just tell. And she did not disappoint. It took her about 5 minutes to order her corned beef wrap--only meat, no cheese, no lettuce, no sauce, nothing but meat. "The Jewish way." Whatever that means. She also wanted extra meat since she wasn't getting the cheese. So she got her order and opened it up right at the counter and was not happy because "last time it was bigger." The guy behind the counter explained that everything is the same, maybe it's just wrapped tighter. She had asked for it to go, but took the bag and sat down at the table directly in front of me. (The building is still empty, mind you.) Oh, and did I mention that she was on the phone the whole time. Not just the phone, speaker phone. The whole time she was ordering and paying and complaining, a person, whom I assumed to be her grown son since I could hear everything, was carrying on a conversation with her. So she sat down, still talking on speaker phone, and began, after further examination of her food, to eat. A few bites into it she jumped up like her seat was on fire and sprinted to the counter. "There's cheese on this wrap. I said meat only." "Where is the cheese, m'am." "Right there, you can see that there was cheese there! You must have put it on and then taken it back off!! I can't have cheese!!! I'm allergic to cheese!!!! And there was lettuce on it but I spit that out!! I just wanted meat!" "Okay, m'am. Sorry, we'll make you a new one." This one was made by one person and supervised by two more just to be sure there was NO CHEESE. And all this time, her poor son was still talking. Pretty soon, he said, "Mom. Mom. Are you there." He must have been used to it though, because just when I thought he had hung up, she came back and they started talking like nothing had happened. He asked her to get some extra horseradish sauce to bring home. They kept talking, and she kept cautiosly eating. She got up and asked for a cup and got some water, all the while loudly continuing her conversation with the phone still sitting on the table. Luckily, I finished eating and stood up to walk out, and just as I opened the door, she was up again and headed to the counter. And from the phone, I heard, "Mom, don't forget the horseradish."

4 comments:

kathy said...

that's got to be the funniest thing i've read in ages...(from across the room, "Mom, Mom, why are you laughing?"

Amy said...

Oh.My.Lord.

Katrina said...

Heehee! I'm so glad I'm not the only one who gets a secret thrill out of watching crazy people do their thing.

ada said...

Seriously? Did this really happen? I really want to hear to hear this story in person. I've already read it twice. You should've called me...I could've made it there in 30 seconds. Good stuff.