Mmm, Tacos

There are times throughout the school year that are more challenging than others. The first day (and week) of school is a challenge because five year olds don't have a clue about anything at school. Any day with a field trip or assembly is crazy because it's out of the normal routine and causes extra excitement. The first day of snow creates a buzz in the halls and the classroom that causes kindergarteners to bounce off the walls. And then there are holidays. Not President's Day or Columbus Day or Memorial Day. Those are fine. But the other holidays that include gifts or parties or candy. Those holidays are not fun for a kindergarten teacher. A regular kindergarten day is enough to suck every ounce energy from Wonder Woman. But as soon as you throw in costumes or sugar or Santa or wrapping paper it's like that myspace video with the coke and Mentos. And so here's where we are. The day before Halloween. (I have to be careful, they can sense just the thought of it.) I have actually banned the word from my classroom. I know, I know. It's just a fun holiday that lets kids pretend and get treats. Blah, blah, blah. It is the bane of my existence this week and I'm not happy. If you've read my blog for any amount of time you know that I really don't complain much. But today I am suffering from morning sickness*, craving a crunchy taco supreme from taco bell, and having to deal with 13 five year olds, who if I could choose their costumes, would all be dressed as those flying monkeys from The Wizard of Oz.

Oh, well. A few more days and it will all be over. At least until mid-November when Christmas trees appear.

*Yes, I'm pregnant. That's a blog for another day.

ACSI

I've been trying to write about my trip to Seattle for a few days now and decided that the conference was something that you had to attend to really appreciate. So I'll skip most of the details and just tell you some of my favorite parts.

*Our fearless leader wanting to stop in Tri-Cities for gas on the way to Seattle. Umm...Tri-Cities is not on the way to Seattle.

*Learning more about my co-workers. (Maybe more than I wanted to know.)

*Worship time spent with hundreds of Christian school educators.

*The classes. Especially "Music in the Christian Classroom" and "Hands On Teaching."

*Learning that there is a thought that there were, in fact, dinosaurs on the ark with Noah.

*Meeting the teacher who I want to be when I grow up.

*Freebies from the venders at the conference.

*The 40 minute quarter mile trip to our hotel from the restaurant because of the power outage. (Mostly because it made for good stories when we called home. With every call the distance got shorter and the time got longer.)

*Truth or dare during the power outage. What's told in Bothell, stays in Bothell.

*Mom's Teriyaki Restaurant.



Things that weren't so fun.

*Having the worst sore throat of my life for the first two days.

*Hard hotel matresses.

*Not being able to find chicken noodle soup anywhere in western Washington.

*The amazingly frightening traffic in western Washington.


On Friday afternoon we left Bothell for Seattle. This was the part of the trip where we played instead of worked. That'll be my next blog.

Teacher School

I'll be back in a few days. We're going on a trip to Bothell, Washington for a Christian educator's conference. Should be lots of fun. Especially the two days we spend in Seattle playing afterwards. Have a good week and I'll tell you all about it when I get home.

"Show and Hotel"

As challenging as my kindergarten class is this year, they still make me laugh everyday. Like today when one little girl was so excited that it was "show and hotel" day. So here's what came to school today to be shown and hotelled.

*one artkit with a book in which you can color anything

*one spiderman sticker book that brought "oohs" and "aahs" from the crowd

*one story about vistiting grandparents who apparently can do backflips and somersaults

*one dinosaur playset with dinosaurs that try to eat cars

*one soccer trophy

*one set of orange and red pom-poms

*one little bag of "thousands" of polished rocks (more "oohs" and "aahs")

*one stuffed polar bear

*one "Bedtime Bear" Care Bear

*one leopard print umbrella in a case that matches

*one stuffed, blue Scooby Doo

*one story: "It was my birthday and now I'm this many (5 fingers) and then I'm going to be this many (3 fingers)."

Ahh, Kids

Nathan, a guest at Josh's birthday party, was glad that the party was at "Skatema Plazma."

A first grader told me that there was "evidence that a boy has been in the girl's bathroom." That evidence was that the seat was up and they didn't flush!

While discussing pets and veterinarians today in class, one little girl claimed that her baby brother was her pet.

Contrary to what one 7th grader thinks, 7492.57 divided by 32.71 is not "fries."

8 Years Ago

Today my first born son turns 8. Eight years old. It seems so impossible. We waited a long time before we had kids and it took awhile after that for him to come around. And I remember how extremely happy I was to find out that I was pregnant. I knew right away because I'm one of those "lucky" women who knows pretty much the next day if I'm pregnant. Instant naseau all day long. That lasted for about ten weeks then I felt great the rest of the time. Being pregnant is exciting and wonderful and scary and miraculous. And I enjoyed almost every minute of it. And then the day came. Well, labor came. Josh didn't actually come until the next day after 32 hours of labor and a c-section. But it was so worth it. He was this adorable little bundle with tons of black hair that stood up every which way. Not to brag, but all the doctors and nurses told me that he was a cute baby and that not all babies are as cute as their parents think. (Please don't tell me if they told you the same thing about your newborn.) He was a good baby. He didn't cry much and loved being held which told me right away that he was going to be a snuggler.


And here we are eight years later and he is smart and funny and mostly sweet. He likes dinosaurs and animals and movies and girls (yikes). He has this magnetic personality and therefore lots of friends. He does really well at school but likes recess best. He still has crazy hair that sticks up everywhere and he likes it that way. And he still likes to be held and will crawl up on my lap to snuggle. Except now, everytime he does, I breathe in the smell of his hair and hold on tight because I never know if it might be the last time.

Happy birthday, Josh. I love you more than words can say.

Did You Know...

...that it takes exactly the same amount of time to say the pledge of allegience as it takes me to make sure 13 kindergarteners are all standing and putting the correct hand over their hearts.

...that picking the perfect pumpkin at a nearby farm can take some 5 year olds a loooong time.

...that no matter how many times I do dishes, there are always more to do.

...that even though my son is two days away from turning eight, I still feel like he was born yesterday.

...that regardless of what my six year old does at one moment, he can melt my heart in the next.

...that when discussing television shows with alarming plots, you should make sure everyone listening knows that it's just tv.

...that seventh graders will eat anything. Even sunflower seeds that they harvested, soaked, cooked...and burned.

...that it's still possible to genuinely surprise people. :)

Conversation

This morning on the way to school...

Adam: "A lot of people murder."
Josh: "Don't talk about that, Adam."
Adam: "But look at all the trash by the road."
Me: "Umm, Adam, do you mean litter?"
Adam: "Oh, yeah. A lot of people litter."


At lunch...

Me: "Adam, do you know where Josh is?"
Adam: "Am I my brother's keeper?"*

*We've been studying Cain and Abel in Bible class this week.

Persuasion

Yesterday at church I taught the elementary Bible class for the regular teachers who were out of town. Both of my boys were in the class and very excited that I was their teacher. I was teaching a lesson on Noah and how he made the right decision to live for God. One of the activities was to hold some little plastic stars behind my back, half marked with tape and half not marked. The class had to guess if they were marked or not and got to keep the ones they guessed right. They won the game if they had the most stars at the end. The trick was that there were two persuaders who tried to convince them which way to vote. Adam was the persuader who I told to always tell the truth and Josh was the persuader who I told to always lie. It didn't take the kids long to figure out what the persuaders were doing and they won 4 to 2. After the game, I asked them how they knew which persuader to believe. One boy said, "Well, Adam is younger and cuter so he must be the most honest." Obviously Josh took offense at that. Especially the cuter part! But he wasn't too upset and even told his dad the story after church. I personally think they are both the cutest kids I know and am proud of how honest they are. But I might keep the "younger and cuter" advice in mind the next time I vote.

Today...

Today I learned...

...five year olds can need two bandaids in the first five minutes of school.
...I can tie shoes with my eyes closed.
...a gillion is not a number.
...aloe belongs to the lily family.
...I know who's stomping in line without even looking.
...there are only two lego "humans" in the bucket, but three boys who want them.
...kindergarteners can, and will, cheat at Candy Land.
...casting out 9's is easy once you get the hang of it.
...kindergarteners love guinea pigs more than guinea pigs love kindergarteners.
...if your forehead is hot and you don't feel good you might have a "feber."
...it is possible to say "don't do that" a gillion times in one day.

Well That's New

I've been teaching for a while. I've taught every age from kindergarten to 8th grade. I've had many, many challenging students and two whole classes that have made me reconsider my choice of careers. (Not to mention the parents!) But I've hung in there because I love teaching and most days the rewards far outweigh the trials. This is my third year teaching kindergarten. The reason I took the kindergarten job is because Josh was in kindergarten the first year and Adam was the second year. But this year it's just me and a bunch of other people's kids. (Except one who feels almost like mine.) And of course I love each one. How could I not. They are completely adorable. And I truly understand that their mommies love them just as much as I love my own boys. And so I try to treat them as I want Josh and Adam to be treated by others. But here's the trouble. Out of the 13 kids in my class, at least 6 of them have to be watched every second of every day. As soon as they're out of sight, they're in trouble. Yesterday is a prime example. I had hitting, arguing, and fibbing. Not all that unusual really. But I also had three things happen that have never happened to me in all my years of teaching. First, one of the boys colored all over my white board with a non-white board marker. Luckily I was quick to catch it and was able to wash it off. Then one of the girl's was chasing another girl around with a push pin from the bulletin board. What?!?! I'm still not sure what possessed her to do such a thing. Then, just in the nick of time, I caught one girl about to give herself a haircut. To this I responded, "I have taught kindergarten for two years without anyone cutting their hair. Do not mess up my record!!" (And then I took away her scissors for a week.) All this and it wasn't even a full moon. Each day I'm having to re-evaluate my management techniques and adapt them to rogue colorers, pin chasers, and hair cutters. So I have to ask myself two questions. What will happen on Monday? And how many days 'til June? :)

It Can Happen

We have been seeing a sign on our way to school the past week or so. It says:

LOST TURTLE

704-****

*REWARD*

Lost turtle? It would be funny except that two summers ago we lost a turtle. Some people think that turtles are slow, but I'm convinced that it's all an act to fool everyone. As soon as you turn your back on these wily creatures, they take off running. Okay, so they don't run all that fast (with the short legs and carrying a house on their backs), but they are faster than the average population may think. This fact combined with leaving a 5 year old in charge of said creature is just asking for trouble. But the turtle we lost wasn't your average, everyday pet shop kind of turtle.

The turtle who ran away was a hillbilly, cross country traveling, turtle. When we were in West Virginia visiting relatives*, my uncles thought it would be great fun to bring box turtles for the boys to play with. And it was. They loved them (all 4 of them). And even my grandparents got involved. Grandpa found the perfect box for them and Grandma gave the boys veggies to feed their new pets. It really was fun, so when we got ready to head for home, we decided to bring the smallest of the turtles with us. We didn't tell the boys so that they wouldn't bug us for 2,347 miles about holding it. We quietly put it in a shoe box and hid it under the van seat. Without the boys ever suspecting a thing, we fed and watered our secret passenger and he safely made it all the way across the country to his new home. The boys were of course thrilled when we revealed what was in the box. And this free turtle only cost us about $100 (tank, heater, light, bedding, food). He was a great pet until that fateful day. Josh loved to take the turtle out into the yard to wander around in the grass and eat bugs. So one day in the late summer, he was doing just that. I got busy doing outdoor chores and Josh got busy chasing butterflies and before we knew it the turtle was gone. We own five acres with no fences, so finding a six inch long, very well camouflaged turtle was nearly impossible. We did look though. For quite a while. And still didn't find the turtle.**

So when I saw the "LOST TURTLE" sign this week, I thought of our own lost turtle and wondered if there was any way that they had found our lost turtle and that he had escaped again. Not likely, I know. When I told my mom this story, she told me the way to find out. She said, "Call the number and ask them if their turtle had a southern accent." Very funny, mom.

*The story of this trip would be a whole other blog. Maybe someday.

**Josh got a new turtle for his next birthday. We still have that one.

5 Ways To Tell That A 6 Year Old Is Sick

1. He falls asleep on the couch in the principal's office at school and sleeps through the lunch rush going down the hall.
2. You take him into the store to get some medicine and he doesn't ask for a toy or candy or pop. Just for a bottle of water.
3. He doesn't utter a peep the whole 25 minute drive home.
4. He lays on the couch watching old Tom and Jerry cartoons so quietly that you think he's asleep.
5. His mommy can't even appreciate the quiet because her baby is sick.

Show and Tell--9/14

*a nintendo magazine with all of L's favorite "charavers"
*a coloring picture of K's pet kitty named Princess
*a car, transformers named Jetfire and bumblebee, and a ninja turtle who does "that" when you squeeze his legs
*a tiny treasure chest filled with "treasures" (polished rocks and marbles)
*a pink poodle purse with magic coins (a quarter and penny)
*a stuffed cheetah with a baby doll face and hands
*a guy with "one of these and a belt and a necklace and a green thing on him and a thing to look at"
*a story about catching butterflies while camping (no show, just tell)
*an angel pin that "is so teeny"
*a monopoly junior board game that C loves very much

Ahh, kindergarten.

A Sign With Antlers

This morning I chose to take the back roads into town to school. I did this for two reasons. One, to time the trip to see how much longer it was than taking the highway. And two, to avoid said highway which often causes my anxiety to soar first thing in the morning. On the drive I discovered that the trip only takes an extra minute or two. Kind of what I thought, but I wanted to make sure for future mornings. I also discovered that there is a flock of wild turkeys that spend their mornings in a field off Ramsey Road. This was the second time I had seen them there. (Adam called them roosters, but then remembered that they were turkeys.) And the third thing I discovered was that back roads aren't always safer. Here's why.

I almost hit a deer, a big one, just after leaving home. Had she not chosen to run parallel with the car for a few seconds, which gave me time to slow down, I surely would have hit her. Strike one for lowering my anxiety.

And then shortly after that, a truck passed me and a squished pop can flew out of the back of his truck right in front of me. Not a big deal, but it caught my attention and startled me. Strike two. No sooner had that happened than out of the corner of my eye in the rear view mirror I saw a big brown tarp fly out of the back of the same truck. At least that's what I thought it was. Until I focused on my mirror. It wasn't a tarp at all. It was a moose!* A huge moose with huge antlers. And it hadn't flown out of the back of his truck but was tripping and staggering across the road right between the truck and a car going the opposite direction. If I had been three seconds earlier it would have crossed right in front of me. Strike three.

So, here's my dilemma. Do I take the highway and put my life in the hands of all the drivers going 65 mph around me (including numerous logging trucks)? Or do I take the back roads and risk encountering a thousand pound animal who doesn't look both ways?

We have actually been trying to decide whether or not to sell our house and move into town. It's a hard decision because we love our house and living out where it's so quiet and beautiful. But then there's the drive. Rolling your car a few times makes driving a little difficult, so it's been a real issue. So today, as I drove the back way to avoid the danger but had to dodge wildlife along the way, I began to wonder if it was a sign. Either way I go, it raises my anxiety. So what do I do? I just don't know, but for now I'm going to go clean my house just in case we call a realtor in the next few days. And I'm going to pray for wisdom and answers and a big bubble of safety around my minivan. And that all future signs are bunnies or kittens or at least don't have antlers.

*The moose was fine and continued on his way with no more than an increased heartbeat and a story to tell his buddies.

100

Here's the thing. This is my 100th post on my blog and I've been racking my brain trying to come up with something that would symbolize the significance of that. But I've got nothing. I thought about "100 things about me" or "100 things I love" or "100 things I've done 100 times (or more)." But nothing feels right. I even missed my first day of school blog waiting to have something special for my 100th post. All I can think of is the day I sat in front of the computer and created this blog. It was spur of the moment although I had considered it a few times before. But the truth is, I did it as a distraction. A distraction from the terrifying pain in my chest and my brain telling me that I was going to die. It was right in the middle of the worst of my anxiety disorder and I couldn't do anything but pray and wait for it to pass. I couldn't clean house because of the exhaustion. I couldn't play with my kids because of the pain. I couldn't even take a shower because I was afraid I would have a heart attack and no one was home to find me except the boys. Wow. I was really sick. Thinking about it now it's easy to see. But then I just thought that I was dying or crazy or both. So I sat and wrote as best I could. I don't even remember what my first few posts were about but I'm sure I hid most of what was going on in my writing just as I did in real life. But the writing helped. It did distract me. And that distraction somehow lessened the anxiety and the symptoms it caused.

So, here I am, 10 months and 100 posts later. Mostly well. 100 times healthier. A million times happier. Now the only thing my blog distracts me from is dirty dishes. And for that I am 100% thankful.

Summer 2 School

I have spent the last week or so getting ready for school. I am going to be teaching kindergarten in the mornings and 7th grade math, science, and music in the afternoons. I am looking forward to it even though it means no more days at the beach for a while. I am a teacher. Through and through. I love the feeling of knowing that I have taught a student something new. And there is no better reward than seeing the eyes of a 5 year old light up when they finally realize that t+a=ta. As of today I have 12 kindergarteners, but my class limit is 14 and the numbers usually change the first week of school. I have three 7th graders so far, which will be great and give me a real chance to make sure they are ready for upper level math and science.

I thought I would share a few pictures of my cute classroom with you.

This is the library and reading corner. I also use the table in the back for reading groups, art projects, and other group activities.

This is one of my bulletin boards. On it there are a variety of educational posters, the birthday graph, and yellow felt used for a felt board to do counting and games on.

This year instead of desks, I am trying tables and chairs. I do have an extra desk just in case someone can't quite handle being so close to other classmates. Hopefully I won't have to use it.

On Thursday we had open house. About half of my students came with their parents to see the classroom and meet me. It was great to see so many anxious faces.

But they also saw something that I bet they weren't expecting. This...

Yes, this is Boys 2 Men circa 1986. My "friends" and co-teachers, Kathy and Marci, thought it would be really funny to put this up on the back of my classroom door complete with hearts. Now don't get me wrong. I was a fan of the r&b group back in the day, but I never had posters of them. At least not until now. When I discovered this the day of open house I laughed like crazy and racked my brain trying to remember the words to one of their songs to sing as I walked down the hall. (I didn't think of any.) And when I saw my "friends" I told them what a good joke they had pulled. All the while reminding myself to take it down before parents arrived. Well, guess what. I forgot. I forgot all about it until the last parents were asking questions and their younger child closed the door. Oh my goodness. I explained that it was a joke and we laughed together. But I didn't get to explain to the half a dozen other families who had obviously seen it. I could have told them it was for my music appreciation class. Or that I was encouraging diversity. Or that my "friends" think that they are SOOO funny. Anything other than them thinking that I have some kind of freakish teenage crush on this harmonic quartet.

So first thing Friday morning (well, after I took pictures), I carefully took it down and put it in a safe place. Because you can bet that my "friends" will someday walk into their classrooms and find the adolescent faces of these "boys" staring back at them. And don't be a bit surprised if it's on conference day!

Also Known As...

My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is: Very Lady Jen the Harmonious of Withering by the Wold Get your Peculiar Aristocratic Title

What's a wold* and why am I withering by it? I like my peculiar aristocratic title, though. Very cool. (Thanks Scots.) I think I will make my students call me this. Well, maybe not the kindergarteners. Just the 7th graders. And my friends. All my friends must now address me as Very Lady Jen the Harmonious of Withering by the Wold. Okay, just Very Lady Jen the Harmonious.

My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is: Duchess Jen the Innocent of Fiddlers Green

Wait, I actually like this one better. I am innocent. (No laughing Katrina and Kathy! You know it's true.) I like fiddle music. And I have lots of green (Irish) blood. So you may address me as either of my peculiar aristocratic titles. :)

My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is: Entirely Miss Reverend Lady Jen the Disheveled of Menzies on the Minges

Okay. They just keep getting better, don't they? I love this one. This is the one. I want this one.

*wold: a tract of open country; a low hill

Catty

There are some things that they don't tell you about in parenting books. One is that when you are raising boys you should be prepared to have all kinds of creatures come into your house. I have had bug boxes full of grasshoppers, ladybugs, butterflies, moths, and other varieties of creepy crawlies spend the night on my coffee table. I don't mind. Really. It's been quite interesting seeing these fascinating creatures up close.


A few days ago the boys found a fat, furry caterpillar. They were so excited. They fixed up their biggest bug box for it with sticks and grass and leaves. They played with her (they decided it was a her...I didn't ask how they knew) and named her "Catty." Catty became their pet. They took her with us wherever we went and showed her off to kids and adults alike. They took her out of the box and let her crawl over their hands and arms. That's what Adam was doing on Tuesday night. He was sitting on the couch looking at Catty as she crawled on his arm and asked me all kinds of questions about her like "What kind of butterfly would she be?" "When would she make a cocoon?" and "How long did she have to stay in the cocoon?" I answered as best I could. Then we went on with our night. We watched cartoons together and had Popsicles for dessert. I put the boys in bed around 8:00 as usual and was lying on the couch trying to enjoy a few minutes of peace before doing end of the day chores. Around 8:15 Adam came out of his room and said, "Mom, did you put Catty back in the bug box?" "Ummm, no," I answered, "Didn't you?" "No. I forgot. I sat her on the couch arm when I got up." I jumped up since the couch arm in question was the very one my head happened to be lying on. Thankfully there was no squished caterpillar under my cheek. We looked all around the couch for Catty but she was no where to be found. She wasn't under the cushions. She wasn't under the couch. I felt like she was crawling in my shirt, but she wasn't there either. I told Adam that it wasn't very responsible for him to leave Catty out of her box to which he responded, "I got distracted by the Popsicle!!"

Adam was so sad. He had become quite attached to Catty and couldn't understand why she would run away to where there was no grass for her to eat when she had a perfectly fine home that he had made for her. I finally got him settled down and back into bed, but I continued to look for Catty because now instead of being a fat, furry caterpillar in a bug box, she was a big, hairy bug crawling around my house. I just knew she was somewhere in the couch and as soon as I sat back down she would attack. I'm not necessarily scared of caterpillars, but I don't want one on me. Especially when I least expect it. So I continued to look to no avail. Catty had disappeared.

Adam has since accepted that Catty is gone. And I have since accepted that there is a creature loose somewhere in my house. And every morning from now 'til winter I will be looking for, not Catty the caterpillar, but Catty the butterfly.

Everything by Number

What does it mean when a kid counts everything? My Adam does that. When we were at "Walking with the Dinosaurs" he leaned over and said "15." 15? "15 what?" I asked. "15 teeth on that big dinosaur mouth," he answered. I never would have thought to count the teeth in the huge mouth that framed the curtain where the dinosaurs appeared, but he did. Since then he has also started counting many more things, including the train cars that pass whenever we get stopped at the crossing. I didn't even know he was doing it until one day he said, "What comes after 99?!? What comes after 99?!?" Once I told him, he hurried and caught up with his counting and ended up on 257. Wow! That was a long train. Who knew? He has also apparently been counting the days that his brother has had the "American Dragon Jake Long" game boy game. A million. As in, "He's had that game for a million days. When do I get a turn?" I'm not so sure that one's accurate.

Last night at motocross at the North Idaho Fair he said, "Mom, did you know that there are 8 of those bumpy things on the track?" "No I didn't know that." But I do know how many times he asked for a snow cone. A million.